How Parents Can Prevent Bullying

As schools across the United States start a brand new school year this month, school administrators once again have to figure out ways to combat the serious problem of bullying.  “One hundred percent of children are touched by bulling as a victim, perpetrator or bystander,” says Dr. Meline Kevorkian who is the author of a new book, “101 Facts About Bullying: What Everyone Should Know.”

How to Spot Bullying

Some of the signs of bullying are not as apparent as your son or daughter coming home from school with a black eye.  There are a few classic signs parents should watch out for such as claiming illness to avoid going to school, missing possessions or money, bedwetting, problems concentrating, trouble with schoolwork, and irritability.  Parents should also be aware that if your child possesses certain characteristics such as low self-esteem, has emotional reactions, has inability to stand up for his or herself, has a lack of social skills, or suffers from insecurity it may make him or her more of a target for bullying.

So what if your child is not exhibiting the classic signs of bullying, but you, as a parent, still think that there might be a problem at school?  One thing you can try is to ask your child ‘Who’s the bully in your class?’ or ‘Was anyone bullied at school today?’ and pay close attention to the reaction.  A child’s response should give clues as to if they have been the target of a bully or even help them to open up about problems they have experienced with a bully.

Why Bullying Prevention is so Important

Some adults may have the wrong perception of bullying; that it will ultimately produce a child with more emotional strength or a stronger character having dealt with those difficult situations.  However, bullying is more likely to put children at risk for long-term troublesome and depressive behaviors.  Another real problem from bullying is that “children (who) continually observe bullying that goes unchecked or ignored by adults are at a greater risk of becoming bullies themselves,” which could ultimately make bullying an epidemic in our schools.  Finally, bullying can and has been proven to lead more serious bad behaviors such as vandalism, shoplifting, and other destructive or aggressive behavior.

What Can Parents Do to Prevent Bullying

A common misconception of how children should handle a bully that the bullied child should fight back, which is actually one of the worst ways for a child to handle a bully.  “The cycle of bullying and victimization is reinforced when the victim responds aggressively,” says Kevorkian.  She also says that mediation seldom works in a case of bullying because by asking the children to work together to resolve their differences revictimizes the victim.

Begin by Talking to Your Child
The best way to begin is to start talking to your child.  Ask your children how their day was at school.  If you are seeing more uncomfortable pauses from them or they are afraid to respond there might be a problem.

Be on the Lookout for Injuries
Keep an eye out for injuries that are more than just a scuffed knee from a gym class or recess. 

Talk to Other Parents
If your child is having a problem with a bully, chances are there are other students who are having a problem.  Talk to other parents so that you are aware of problem kids in the class and their bullying methods.

What to Do if You Have Confirmed Your Child is a Victim of a Bully

Keep Records of Incidents
Keep a written record of the incidents, recording the names of the children involved, when and where it happened, and what happened.  Also, keep records of meetings with teachers, guidance counselors, or school administrators.

Request a Meeting With the Teacher
Make sure you promptly meet with the teacher to address the concerns in a friendly, non confrontational way.  You should ask the teacher for his or her observations and ask how he or she intends to put an end to the bullying.  Finally, set an appointment with the teacher for a follow-up.

How BoostKids Can Help:
BoostKids is a program that can help increase a child’s confidence by teaching social skills to children and building their character.  BoostKids has been and is currently being taught in schools, non-profit organizations, and after-school programs.  The program is now available as an at-home training program for children and their parents.  The key training tool of the BoostKids program is an interactive CD-ROM that shows kids the right-way and the wrong-way to handle social situations.  They learn from real kid actors in real-life scenerios! 

For more information about what’s included in BoostKids, click here. 

ORDER NOW - Free 30-day Trial, click here.

Back to Media Page