A big part of self esteem building and training with kids is preparing them for the situations they will encounter in life. At some point they will face challenges, frustrations, successes, and accomplishments and it is important to help kids deal with these different experiences in a productive way. When a child learns how to independently handle a situation, complete a challenge in front of them, or overcome an obstacle in their way their self esteem will be grow.
The initial step in helping kids develop the ability to deal with challenges in life is to give them specific and concrete ideas or skills to use in these situations. For example, many children growing up will feel awkward in social situations. They are unsure of them selves as they are increasingly exposed to new and unfamiliar social situations. It could be greeting a friend’s parents, speaking with a teacher, or interacting with peers in and outside of school. These situations can be socially challenging for kids and can produce feelings of inadequacy. This inadequacy can negatively affect a child’s self esteem with feelings of self-doubt at functioning socially. This points directly to the importance of providing children with the social “know-how” to independently function. Here are a few tips to emphasize.
Social Tips
Be the first to say “hello”
Remember the person’s name
Give a firm handshake
Stand tall, smile, and make eye contact
Speak clearly and ask questions of the other person
These are all examples of a simple social strategy that should be directly covered with kids. This will help them feel prepared to act in unfamiliar or challenging social situations and through this independent feeling of social adeptness self esteem building and training can take place.
This preparedness does not only apply to social understandings kids face but also to individual challenges, frustrations, and successes testing their character and self esteem. For instance, a child might be faced with the challenge of accomplishing a goal. It may be getting a good grade on a test, making a sports team, or saving money to buy a bike. Whatever it may be, accomplishing goals and completing challenges will help self esteem building and training with kids.
When a child can feel satisfaction from mastering a challenge set before them their self esteem will be positively affected. This is why it is important to directly provide kids with the understanding they need for setting and accomplishing goals. Here are a few things to cover.
Setting Goals
What are your interests?
What are some goals you would like to accomplish?
Accomplishing Goals
It will not be easy
It requires a lot of effort on your part
Write it down and put it in a place where you will see it
Do something right away towards accomplishing the goal
Stay focused on the goal and repeat it to yourself daily
Do not let negative thoughts enter your mind
This type of reinforcement will help equip the child with a better understanding of the effort it takes to complete a challenge and accomplish a goal.
The better prepared they are of the process the better their chances are of accomplishing the goal, which results in self esteem building and training from the completed task. It is obviously important here in this example to understand each child so that realistic goals can be set. Each feeling of accomplishment, no matter how big or small, will help to build a child’s self esteem, so parents or adults dealing with multiple kids should make it a priority to value each accomplishment among kids equally. This will help the child feel their accomplishment is important.
In closing, experience is the main ingredient in building self esteem. Experiencing accomplishment, acceptance, and adeptness socially or individually will play a large role in building self esteem. This is why it is important to properly prepare kids for the situations they will face in life. With a better understanding and awareness of the knowledge essential for thriving in social or individual challenges, a child will be better prepared to positively affect their self esteem.
How BoostKids Can Help: BoostKids is a program that can help increase a child’s confidence by teaching social skills to children and building their character. BoostKids has been and is currently being taught in schools, non-profit organizations, and after-school programs. The program is now available as an at-home training program for children and their parents. The key training tool of the BoostKids program is an interactive CD-ROM that shows kids the right-way and the wrong-way to handle social situations. They learn from real kid actors in real-life scenerios!
For more information about what’s included in BoostKids, click here.
About the author: Charlie Copp is program coordinator for BOOST KIDS, an interactive CD ROM-based program for kids ages eight and up, that teaches, demonstrates, and reinforces the value of applying people skills and strong character to everyday life.His work with BOOST KIDS confirms what Copp has always believed: that kids and teens are hungry for character-building life skills, and with them gain the confidence needed to succeed in the classroom, on the playing field, in their interpersonal relationships, and on the job.
The initial step in helping kids develop the ability to deal with challenges in life is to give them specific and concrete ideas or skills to use in these situations. For example, many children growing up will feel awkward in social situations. They are unsure of them selves as they are increasingly exposed to new and unfamiliar social situations. It could be greeting a friend’s parents, speaking with a teacher, or interacting with peers in and outside of school. These situations can be socially challenging for kids and can produce feelings of inadequacy. This inadequacy can negatively affect a child’s self esteem with feelings of self-doubt at functioning socially. This points directly to the importance of providing children with the social “know-how” to independently function. Here are a few tips to emphasize.